Ian D. Smith

Ian D. Smith - Writer

The Front View (aka The View From Here) (ISSN 1758-2903): Telescopes @ http://tinyurl.com/q88dqv

Transmission 6 (ISSN 1752-3729): Nobody Knows a Damned Thing @ http://tinyurl.com/dnmkzd

Transmission 4: The North is So Much Better for Youngsters Today @ http://tinyurl.com/c35e83

Nobody Told the Horse, I Hadn’t Even Started and Not Your Problem (Surprising Stories) @ http://tinyurl.com/qnnf5x

Think of a Name For It (Verbsap) @ http://tinyurl.com/c4utyy

The Day I Asked Blake Morrison If He Raced Pigeons (Eclectica) @ http://tiny.cc/uZSuM

Swing Naked, How They Looked at the Sun and Roads That Go On and On (Eclectica Spotlight Author) @ http://tinyurl.com/c5mn5g

There Has to Be a Better Balance (Eclectica) @ http://tinyurl.com/dm892t

Lulu storefront @ http://tinyurl.com/bjl77r

Tony Blair: The Wilderness Years (Amazon)  @  http://tinyurl.com/cn4fsb

Deepa Kandaswamy’s review of Tony B @ http://tinyurl.com/bpnxgh

Please back my novel at Authonomy.com.

Scarguevara

My interpretation of Arthur Scargill

Packed to the rafters

What joy it is to pop on your slippers and stay in with a cup of Horlicks to watch TV. Here’s a sneak preview of the sort of thing we can look forward to:

7pm Antiques Road Show. This week the experts go overseas to the famous Vatican City in Italy. You’ve got your Canalettos, your Bacons and your famous Popes large and small. There’s more gold leaf than you can shake a stick at and Fiona gets a surprise when a stuffed Galapogos island finch once owned by Darwin leads her to doubt the existence of God…in the Vatican! Priceless!

8pm. Lark Rise to Candleford. The story of how simple white folk from humble beginnings went on to rule the world to this day. This week Mr Timmins has something to say when Dorcus is accused of running a lesbian matriarchy in the post office. Pious Thomas is emasculated when a parcel of Galapogos Island finches goes missing. But Dorcus dips into her copy of Darwin’s The Origin of Species to solve the mystery. Warning: contains strong anachronistic language.

9pm Who Do You Think You Are? There’s a surprise in store for the former Tory leader Ian Duncan Smith when he discovers his great great grandfather was quite literally a lowly blacksmith. Last week, Margaret Thatcher was surprised to find that her great great grandfather was quite literally a lowly mender of thatched roofs. It’s no surprise that the rich and famous queue to have their family trees investigated in this truly riveting programme.

10pm Victorian Farm. Ruth uses a contraption that revolutionised the way we made cake and ate it, while the boys are out in the fields raking it in with a machine that revolutionised the way we raked things in. As well as the Cake Revolution and the Raking Revolution, they also look at the Horse Revolution which revolutionised the way the Victorians put themselves about, a revolution that still affects the way we have grown to live so comfortably and smugly to this day.

11pm Darwin’s Island. Down to the last four in this captivating and sometimes grisly reality island contest that separates the men from the boys. This week the contestants are set a task to finally decide who will reign supreme over the others, and a food fight breaks out around the camp fire when the milk runs out.

You get the idea

Releasing a copy of Tony Blair: The Wilderness Years through BookCrossing.com in the Oxfam Bookshop Salisbury! Go find it (today, after 3pm GMT). :->

Robert McCrum in the Guardian Book Blog writes:

“Don’t get depressed: A writer’s guide to surviving the recession”

He provides six useful points:

1.Write in English, British, or American

2.Know Thy Genre

3.Tell a story

4.Write for yourself

5.Respect the reading public

6.Write every day; shun vanity

To which some wit (David Absalom) has added the brilliant comment:

7. Go to a public school and then Oxbridge

8. Keep in touch with your old public school/Oxbridge mates, particularly those in publishing.

9. Did I mention the public school/Oxbridge thing?

Priceless!

Shaun Wright Phillips’s three match ban shows referees have changed their ruling on what constitutes violent conduct since television cameras showed Christiano Ronaldo flicking out a foot at Tottenham’s Michael Dawson in the Premier League match at White Hart Lane on Saturday 20th December 2008:

Here’s what the FA said back then:

“We contacted the referee [Mike Dean], who confirmed he didn’t see the incident at the time and, having reviewed footage, he has also confirmed he would not have sent the player off for violent conduct had he seen it. On that basis, no further action will be taken.”

Here’s what the FA said when Shaun Wright-Phillips flicked out a foot at Stoke City midfielder Rory Delap during the match at the Britannia Stadium just over a month later on Saturday 31 January 2009:

“The incident was not seen by referee Martin Atkinson. Having now watched video footage of the incident, Atkinson has informed The FA that, had he seen it at the time, he would have shown Wright-Phillips a red card for violent conduct.”

It’s great to see that the rules of the game remain flexible.

Why do sportsmen say “As I’ve said before” so many times in interviews? Is it because they’ve just given five consecutive interviews and they think it’s going out live? In fact, interviews go out on different channels in separate bulletins! They’re probably bored giving the same interview again, but it doesn’t matter if they’ve said it before. So Kevin, Freddie, Frank, Jamie, Rickie and co. please stop saying “As I’ve said before” over and over again.

I don’t think so. However, I did see the deposed Queen Vord on the truly ITV Alan (we are not worthy) Titchmarsh show talking about her new role advising Diddy David Cameron on education. Her previous advice on education had been largely ignored by Labour and now she wants to get even. That’s what politics is all about. Another vowel please, Carol.

It’s a familiar sight–Nothing remains but a carrot and a stick and a puddle, but that’s the reality facing millions of UK school children as the big thaw sets in.

This is the story of one of the rarest insects in Britain, missing for nearly 18 months, which has been found again on Branscombe beach in East Devon.

The scaly cricket had vanished after the grounding of the MSC Napoli in January 2007.

The nocturnal insect, known to live on shingle beaches and to feed, I believe, on “general waste”, was found in a trap which contained the remains of … a Cornish pasty.

I know sausages are little parcels of mystery, lips and bits, but I don’t think it’s fair to describe the mighty pasty as “general waste” nor scaly cricket bait.

Daily Mail